Not for the Faint of Heart

I decided several weeks ago that I had had enough of our disgusting, moldy shower caulking. I refuse to take a bath in our apartment, even after I'm done scrubbing the shower--and this is why (warning: this is gross!):

Isn't that awful? I'm embarrassed to admit that it's looked like that since we moved in last July. I knew I couldn't count on the apartment complex to fix it (well, they might've -- but not until we nagged them for six months, and even then they probably would've done an awful job), so I took matters into my own hands. I went to Lowe's, bought caulk remover gel, new mold-resistant caulk, a 5-in-1 scraper tool, and a caulk gun. This all happened about a month ago. I lined everything up on the bathroom closet floor... and waited.

What for? I'm not sure. I don't know, I guess I thought maybe it would fix itself. However, it didn't, and it continued to bother me... so I made it my weekend project last weekend to recaulk our shower.

Recaulking a shower is not for the faint of heart. It's not that hard, but if you're a perfectionist like I am, it has its challenges. Mostly, though, it's just annoying not to be able to use your shower. (A shout-out goes to Joseph and Kirstin, who let us stumble in their apartment on Monday morning at 6 a.m. so I could shower before I went to work! Wesley, my dirty wonderful husband, chose not to shower, even though he had the opportunity. Sorry, Starbucks customers.)

(Joseph and Kirstin -- I linked to your blogs. That probably means you should update them sometime in the next century. Just sayin'.)

Let me take you through the easy-peasy ten-step process:

Step One: Apply removing gel to existing disgusting caulk. Let gel sit for two hours. (Our caulk was so old and gross that it really didn't need two hours to soften, but whatever -- I waited anyway.)

Step Two: Use your 5-in-1 scraper tool to scrape away the existing disgusting caulk (hereafter referred to as EDC). Now that you've applied the light green caulk remover gel, the EDC is even more D. This step was the one I feared the most, but it might've been the easiest -- again, because our EDC was begging to be torn out and replaced. If yours isn't that bad, it might be a little harder. It will definitely work your arm muscles!

Step Three: Wipe away EDC and remover gel. Use lots of paper towels and try not to touch it... eww. Clean area thoroughly (I used a bleach mixture to discourage mold growth in the future) and dry the surface.

Step Four: Apply painters' (or masking) tape on either side of where the FNC (future nice caulk) will be to create clean lines. Space the tape out approximately 1/4 inch on both sides.

Step Five: Apply new caulk. First, though, learn how to use the gun so you don't have to drive to Lowe's right before they close and ask for advice on how to work it -- you know, "for a friend" who happens to be recaulking her shower. (Sigh.)

Step Six. Smooth caulk bead with your finger so it is evenly and smoothly applied. Take off tape quickly before the caulk begins to set. (Note: Caulk sets quickly.)

Step Seven: Have a mini-breakdown because caulk is not perfectly straight and/or even. Sob uncontrollably in the middle of the bathroom floor and threaten to start all over tomorrow. Or better yet, don't do this and save your (and your husband's) sanity.

Step Eight: Let caulk dry for 24 hours before using shower again. It's probably a good idea to thoroughly clean your shower at this point, too.

Step Nine: Apply extra concealer to under-eye area to hide the fact that you had a mini-breakdown over the new caulk job. Admit that it's really not that bad, and it's certainly better than it was before! For a pick-me-up, google "bad caulk job" and read stories about other people's bad caulking experiences.

Step Ten: Admire new caulk job!

Notice how there are no pictures for steps three through nine? It's partially because my hands were gross and I didn't want to ruin the camera, but it's also because I was freaking out. Poor Wes... seriously. I am such a perfectionist. I specifically included the above shot to demonstrate how crazy I am the kinds of things that upset me. See how the caulk to the right of the corner is thick and to the left of the corner it's thin and kind of raised up? That bothers me. (To the point of sobbing on my bathroom floor.) But, as my husband gently reminded me, it looks much better than it did.

Agreed?